Counting the Cost

June 25, 2018

For the past several years, I have made most of my big decisions with the general expectation in mind that in the next 5-10 years I would be working internationally to equip the church and promote public health. It was fundamental in why I am interested in public health, why I stayed in Charleston after graduation, and why I am now in nursing school. But recently, I had a clinical on a unit where I actually could see myself working as a nurse in the future. It was structured, cooperative, patient-focused, and took the details seriously... basically, it aligned with all my instincts to make things organized and controlled... and in this environment that was crucial and useful. All of a sudden, I could see my life going in all these other directions in which I would work on a unit like that then become a Nurse Practitioner and remain in critical care, or family practice, or any of another million areas that are more structured than trying to move to Burundi and work as a nurse there. To be totally honest, I think it was the first time that I really began to count the cost of what it means for me to be moving to Burundi. In the past it has been either my accepted plan for where I will be or, at the very least, an option that is consistent with the future that I have imagined.

But at the end of the day, the questions that I asked myself through this process ultimately only confirmed that the Lord can use me in Burundi, or in Charleston, or anywhere else I may end up. The Lord has given me the desire to see people be healthy and, most importantly, complete with Him, and this is not limited to any specific place. Instead, I will seek to be compelled by the Holy Spirit to testify to the gospel of the grace of God, as Paul says in Acts 20, wherever that takes me. And right now, in His faithfulness, God has provided the option to testify in Burundi, and I am thankful.

-Eliza Binney